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New Year, New Project

Posted by Ren McCormack on January 4, 2010

So one of my New Years resolutions was to take a photo every day of 2010.  It could be of anything from the mundane to the adventurous–it doesn’t matter.  The point is to chronical a year in photographs.  Although the individual photos may be meaningless, in aggregate they should paint a picture.  Kinda like those works of art that are made up of hundreds of smaller photos.  Each photo simultaniously has both individual and collective meaning.  At least that’s the concept.  We’ll see if it pans out that way. 

And awaaaaay we go…

January 1, 2010:

The first pic of 2010 is quite an exciting one– my walk home after waking up on my friend Damien’s couch after New Years.  I’ll spare you what was playing on both the TV and laptop. 


January 2, 2010:

Only 2 days into the new year and guess what?  I already broke my pledge.  No picture from 1/2/10. 

January 3, 2010:

Since having PRK laser eye surgery on Monday, 12/28/09, my dining room table has turned into my own personal pharmacy. 

January 4, 2010:

The first day back in the office in 11 days.  One word:  Ug. 


Posted in kickball | 4 Comments »

Focus on Fundamentals

Posted by Ren McCormack on August 6, 2009

“I want to be remembered as the guy who gave his all whenever he was on the field.” — Walter Payton



Tonight is the first round of the tournament, which is single elimination.  That means if we lose, tonight is our last game.  When we win, we play next week).  So let’s not lose so that we can live to play again.

Here’s the info from the division:

All right people, this is it. Regular season is over and playoffs begin this Thursday. Will Flippin Sweet be able to go all the way undefeated? Or will Cemetary Dawgs, Tony’s Tigers or Grasskickers come out of nowhere and be our Cinderella Story?

Here are the final standings (the standings on the website are wrong so please go by these):

1. Flippin Sweet 2. Legion of Doom 3. Vandalay 4. Angry Jays Army 5. We Got The Runs 6. Ballers 7. Footloose 8. Kickzilla 9. Kickin Nuggets 10. Tonys Tigers 11. Cemetary Dawgs 12. Grasskickers

Like I said in the email I sent out in June, the top 4 teams will have byes this week. If you are playing in the 7:15pm game this week, PLEASE have someone from your team show up early to ref the 6:30 games. Also, if you have the equipment, please try to get there early so we won’t have to worry about competing with softball for space.

Here is the schedule for Thursday, Aug. 6th


Kickzilla vs. Kickin Nuggets (winner will play Flippin Sweet next week at 7:15)

Footloose vs. Tonys Tigers (winner will play Legion of Doom next week at 7:15)


We Got The Runs vs. Grasskickers (winner will play Angry Jays Army at 6:30 next week)

Ballers vs. Cemetary Dawgs (winner will play Vandalay at 6:30pm next week)

Please note that semifinals will be at 6:30pm on Aug. 20th and finals will be immediately after at 7:15pm.

Scouting Report:

I was wrong when I said that the Tigers were the team that we played the week I missed—that was Vandalay Industries.  Therefore, we’ve played and hung with, beat, or tied the top 6 teams in the division.  We are the 7th seed.  Every year there is a team that comes from nowhere to make a run for the championship.  I really think that we are set up well to be that team. 

The Tigers were the team that we played the week that the games were cancelled because of rain and we played them in flip cup to determine the winner.  I haven’t seen them play, so I can’t give any tips.  They are a work team, and they tend to be loud & enthusiastic.  So don’t let that throw you. 

Action Item 1:  Who’s Playing?

Let me you if you will be at tonight’s 6:30 game. 

Captain’s Tip of the Day:

  • Teams always bring their A game to the tourney and take it a little more seriously.  So don’t get mad at me if I do too– and expect them to as well.
  • Salad without dressing SUCKS.  Remember to bring dressing when you bring a salad to work. 
  • Like I said last week, practice as you play.  The entire season has been practice for the tourney.  Now it’s time to step up and play. 
  • Focus on fundamentals.  My Tips throughout the season have been fundamentals
  • Kick low, run fast, run through 1st base, and don’t watch the throw (only slows you down)
  • Back each other up
  • Call the ball
  • Get the ball back to the pitcher
  • Watch the bunts
  • Tagging up is allowed
  • Base coaches need to actually coach runners
  • the team who makes the fewest errors wins

Action Item 2:  Libations

Who’s bringing beer tonight?  I think we all have brought by now, so we just need a few people to bring a 12er and we’ll combine forces.  I have cups in my bag, so no need to get those.

Action Item 3:  Theme

Every year for the first game of the tourney we have a special theme:  create your own Care Bear.  Be as dirty and sexy as you want.   Rumor has it that Becky is creating special name tags for us. 

What’s your Care Bear name?  (If you can’t think of one now, be ready by game time!)

Care Bears...Who Says They Aren't Sexy?

Care Bears...Who Says They Aren't Sexy?

Weather Report:

The weather looks clear for tonight:

8-6 weather

Social Calendar:

Monday, Aug. 10:  The final Screen on the Green movie is “Rebal Without a Cause.”  We’ll be down there around 6:30.  I suggest you make it.  Please respond to the pending evite so that we know how much space to save.  The last one of the year is always the most popular.  If you can arrive before 6:30, then tag!  You’re it for saving space!

Saturday, Aug. 22:  End-of-Season kickball party.  Book it.  Book it. 

 September 12:  Aaron and I are likely having a party.  (evite to come)

September 18-20:  Russell’s beach house?

October 16-19:  White water rafting and Bridge Day in WV (e-mail to come)


Posted in kickball | 13 Comments »

And Then There Was One

Posted by Ren McCormack on July 30, 2009

Post-Mess Wrap-Up

What can I say about last week’s game?  It was sloppy– really sloppy.  We were soaked to the bone.  People were slipping and sliding all over the place (some one purpose, some because they couldn’t help it).  The d*head bike cop made us empty our cups and threatened to take “the first 10 people he sees drinking to jail” (no joke).  Don’t worry, we finished our cooler anyway.  All that said, it was truly the most fun that I’ve had at kickball in years.  And not because we squashed them something like 12-2.  It was just fun to push through the elements and play a game with abandon.  Thanks to all the super troopers to stuck it out.  Special props to those of us that weathered it (get it?!) and made it to the bar.  Most of the other teams chose dry clothes over flip cup.  That was the wrong call, but it was a fun night, even if “our” area wasn’t packed with kickballers. 

Scouting Report

Tonight we play last year’s returning champion, Flippin’ Sweet.  Needless to say, this is one of the better teams in the division.  I don’t think they are the best, and they definitely are beatable.  We just need to play solid D to keep the game close.  They DO have female bunters, so the catcher needs to be someone who can make the throw to first (see Tips of the Day for a defensive strategy).  We didn’t have any problems getting runners on base last game, but that was because the ball was so dang slippery.  Once it stopped raining, the Ballers D tightened up.  We’ve had problems all season getting runners on base, which is something that we need to improve if we are going to make a run in the playoffs. 

This is the last game of the regular season.  Next week, the playoffs start.  The tournament is single elimination, which is a fancy way of saying you lose and your season is over; you win, and you live to play another day.  Every good coach tells their players how you practice is how you will perform on game day.  Think of the entire season as practice for the tournament.  Let’s go out there tonight and play like it’s the tournament. 

Action Item 1:  Roster Patrol

PLEASE let me know if you plan to be at tonight’s 7:15 game.  Yes, it’s at 7:15, which is a different time than listed on the schedule that I have (and the one you likely have too).  Remember that if you don’t tell me you’re coming and show up, you get less playing time and kick at the bottom of the order. 

Captain’s Tip of the Day:

  • Don’t pop out unless you want to sing a verse from your favorite 80s song.  I’m not joking. 
  • We need a strong outfield performance tonight.  Dropped pop flies are lost opportunities for easy outs. 
  • The shallow center fielder, short stop, and 2nd baseman (all women) need to communicate on who has the throw to 2nd base.  Talk ladies! 
  • The 2nd baseman doesn’t stand near 2nd base– you split the difference between 1st and 2nd. 
  • Defending the bunt (or the munt–the male bunt– which I don’t expect tonight):  the catcher, pitcher, and 3rd baseman need to communicate and call “I got it!” if it’s your ball.  If the ball is kicked towards 3rd base, it’s likely the 3rd baseman’s ball, unless he can’t get there.  Why?  because Jed will have the momentum to get there and make the throw, compared to the pitcher, who has to collect the ball then turn his/her torso towards first and then throw the ball.  If the ball only goes 1 to 3 feet, it’s the catcher’s ball because neigher the pitcher nor the 3rd baseman can get there in time.  If it’s straight up the middle, it’s the pitcher’s ball.  If it’s up the 1st base line, it’s either the catcher’s or pitcher’s ball– just call it.  Because this is a female bunting team, the catcher MUST aggressively defend the bunt when women are kicking.  What does that mean?  follow them as they run up to kick the ball.  As long as you are behind them when they kick, you are abiding by the rules.   The catcher does not need to stand directly behind the kicker– you want to stand angled to the left field line to give you a better throwing angle to 1st base. 
  • The pitcher needs to check that the fielders are set before pitching– we don’t want to catch ourselves off guard!
  • Ask it you have any questions!

Action Item 2:  Libations

If you haven’t brought beer/cups yet, you have this week and next to make amends. 

Action Item 3:  Theme

This week’s theme is 80s free-for-all.  What’s that mean?  It means pick whateverthehellyouwant that’s 80s.  The only stipuation is that you can’t repeat something you were already.  So if your 80s toy was Optimus Prime, you can’t repeat that (sorry Steve). 

HEAD’S UP:  Next week’s theme is a Footloose tradition– create your own Care Bear.  No, this is not another silly costume event.  You just need a creative Care Bear name.  As you can imagine, names usually get quite, um, well, dirty.  One of my favorite kickball e-mails was from an old teammate, Alisa, who wrote something to the effect of, “So I was on the Metro on my way home last night.  I was getting lots of looks, and thought it was just because I was looking sexy in my kickball outfit.  I was almost home when I realized that I still had my name tag on:  Bend Me Over Bear.”    HA! 

Action Item 4:  Bag o’ Schwag

That’s right, FOUR action items this week.  Does someone have the purple bag o’ schwag?  I can’t find it.  It would have been from 3 week’s ago (the week before Metal Mania, July 9 vs Angry Jays Army).  

Social Calendar:

July 31-Aug. 2:  Stu, a buddy of Aaron and me, is having people to his house on a lake in Delaware (about 20 min north of Rhehobeth Beach).   It’s a weekend of drinking games, bonfires on the small beach, wake boarding, and hot tubbing.  I’m sure he’d be cool with Footloose crashing the party (he’s on Legion of Doom).  Let me know if you want details.  Other kickballers will be there.   I’m leaving around 3pm on Friday, if you want a ride.  LET ME KNOW IF YOU ARE INTERESTED.

Monday Aug. 3:  Screen on the Green movie is “On the Waterfront.”  I’ll be there early to set up camp, eat dinner, and polish off a bottle of wine.  It’s really nice to get there early (6:30ish, if not earlier), grab a good spot, and chill.  I highly suggest you join us.   LET ME KNOW IF YOU ARE INTERESTED. 

Monday, Aug. 10:  The final SOTG movie is “Rebal Without a Cause”

Saturday, Aug. 22:  End-of-Season kickball party.  Book it.  Book it. 

It happened one summer, it happened one time
It happened forever, for a short time
A place for a moment, an end to dream
Forever I loved you, forever it seemed

One summer never ends, one summer never began
It keeps me standing still, it takes all my will
And then suddenly last summer

— Suddenly Last Summer, The Motels

A little something about The Motels from Wikipedia:

The Motels were a New Wave music band from the Los Angeles area best known for “Only the Lonely” and “Suddenly, Last Summer“, each of which peaked at #9 on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1982 and 1983, respectively.  

The first incarnation of The Motels formed in Berkeley, California, in 1971.   Hoping for better exposure and seeking a recording contract they made a move to Los Angeles in 1975. While in L.A., Lisa Brenneis left and the band changed its name to “Angels of Mercy” and then to “The Motels.”  In March 1978, Davis and future lead guitarist Jeff Jourard (formerly of a pre-fame version of Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers) decided to reform The Motels.  [Talk about a poor career decision!  But he was replaced in 1980 anyway.]  Wanna know more?  Go here.   

Posted in kickball | 14 Comments »

Let’s Get Physical

Posted by Ren McCormack on July 23, 2009

Post-Mania Wrap Up

Well gang, we tied the d*ckhead team 3-3 (methinks) last week.  We definitely got runners on base, but had problems getting them home.  Definsively, we were rock solid for 90% of the game.  But, as history has shown, the team that makes the most errors usually loses.  A few select error nearly cost us the game.  Our tying run came when Fernanda (aka, Dark Angel 2) kicked a well-placed, slow rolling ball towards first base.  Because I was wearing my aerodynamic faux snake skin pants, I was able to make it from 1st to home for the tying run.  The game ball of the night, however, definitely goes to Jed for getting three thirds of our outs.  He was like a vaccuum, swallowing up anything that was between the 3rd base line and 2nd base. 

Thanks definitely goes to Becky, Chelsea, and Emily for bringing 4 jugs of jungle juice, 2 flavors of jell-o shots, and a reserve 12-pack of beer. 

After the game, we kicked the libations then made our way to McFaddens for flip cup.  Then we split there for 80s night.  The first bar was dead, but we had no problem making our own scene.  Then we gave Heaven a try.  It was 1/2 dead, but again, we made our own fun, as the pics show.  If nothing else, it’s fun to scare people on the street when you’re totally decked out and no one else is.  We allegedly got jumbo slice on the taxi ride home, but all I found was an empty box on the front stoop the next morning next to my backpack. 

Scouting Report

Funny enough, the team we play tonight (Cemtary Dawgs) is the other team who filled in with us when we didn’t have enough people (the other team was the d*heads).  They forfeitted that night too, so they were happy to play.  We like them. 

I’ve never seen them play, but my gut tells me that this is a game for us to win.  And with only one regular season game left before the playoffs, we need to get another victory under our belts to improve our team standing.  So let’s kick some butt.  My prediction:  Footloose 4-2. 

Action Item 1:  Who’s Playing?

We play the 7:15 game tonight.  Please reply so I have a head count.  People have not been very responsive lately.  For shame.  For shame.  I won’t give any grief tonight because I got the post up so late.  Bad Ben…bad Ben…

Also, it’s our night to take the ball bag (3rd and final time).  If you know that you are driving next week and want to volunteer to take it, mucho gracias.  We play at 6:30 next week for our final regular-season game. 

Captain’s Tip of the Day:

  • Relax and kick.  Just keep your head down, lean forward, get your knee overtop of the ball, and try to kick the top half of the ball.  So you know, relax and think of that.
  • Remember:  if you throw the ball, it’s easy to miss, so it’s better to throw to the person covering the base. 
  • Pop Quiz, hotshot:  There is zero or one out with a runner on 2nd base.  Where should you kick the ball?   Answer:  towards the right side of the field (1st/2nd base side).  Why?  to advance the runner and put them in scoring position. 
  • The catcher, pitcher, and 3rd baseman need to communicate on who has any bunts.  If it only goes 1 foot, the catcher likely will take it.  If it’s up the 3rd base line, obviously the 3rd baseman.  If it’s up the 1st base line, it is best for the catcher to take it because she’ll have a straight throwing path to 1st base. BUT, if  its far up the 1st base line, the pitcher probably will take it.  So as every past girlfriend has told me, communication is a good thing. 

Action Item 2:  Theme

This week’s theme will be 80s ikons.  You can define ikon as you will.  Could be a sports hero (Joe Montana, Carl Lewis, Flo Jo, Magic Johnson), music star (Michael Jackson, Madonna), actor/actress (Anthony Michael Hall, Molly Ringwald), or fake ikon (Alf, the Noid, Spudz Mcenzy).   Yes, this will take some creativity; but, as you showed last week, you’re capable of it!

Action Item 3:  Libations

Who’s bringing beer/cups?  If you haven’t yet, you have at least 3 more chances (tonight, next week, the playoffs). 


Social Calendar:

Friday:  The 80s movie in Rosslyn is Short Circuit.   Anyone interested? 

Monday, July 27:  For those vets that remember Chau, captain of the Ball Hogs, she’s back in town from San Diego.  Happy hour at Whitlows. 

July 31-Aug. 2:  Stu, a buddy of Aaron and me, is having people to his house on a lake in Delaware (about 20 min north of Rhehobeth Beach).   It’s a weekend of drinking games, bonfires on the small beach, wake boarding, and hot tubbing.  I’m sure he’d be cool with Footloose crashing the party (he’s on Legion of Doom).  Let me know if you want details.  Other kickballers will be there. 

Monday Aug. 3:  Screen on the Green movie is “On the Waterfront.”  I’ll be there early to set up camp, eat dinner, and polish off a bottle of wine.  It’s really nice to get there early (6:30ish, if not earlier), grab a good spot, and chill.  I highly suggest you join us. 

Monday, Aug. 10:  The final SOTG movie is “Rebal Without a Cause”

Saturday, Aug. 22:  End-of-Season kickball party.  Book it.  Book it. 

I’ve been patient, I’ve been good
Tried to keep my hands on the table
It’s gettin’ hard this holdin’ back
If you know what I mean

I’m sure you’ll understand my point of view
We know each other mentally
You gotta know that you’re bringin’ out
The animal in me

Let’s get physical, physical
I wanna get physical, let’s get into physical
Let me hear your body talk
Your body talk, let me hear your body talk

–Physical, Olivia Newton-John


Posted in kickball | 11 Comments »

Metal Mania Is Here!

Posted by Ren McCormack on July 16, 2009

Metal Mania_skeleton


 Welcome to Metal Mania VI! 

This year’s Metal Mayhem promises to be the biggest and baddest yet!

 Here’s the history of Metal Mania.  In 2004, for no real reason, we decided to dress up in 80s hair band costumes.  Mind you, at this time, no one really dressed up (though we did still do the ringer socks and jelly bracelets).  The next year, the team that we played (Schoolhouse Rockers, now the team we played week 1, Legion of Doom) also decided to dress up.  Then in 2006 the captain of the Rockers (then named K-funk) was league prez, and instituted Halloween in July.  Now, Footloose used to do 2 costume events–Metal Mania and Haloween in July, but I was lazy this year and didn’t plan ahead.  So we’re only doing Metal Mania.  Ok, back to the Metal Mania story.  So in 2005,  we had so much fun the year before we decided to continue it.  Now my memory here is a little thin, but in either 2005 or 2006 we started going to 80’s night at Heaven and Hell in AdMo after the games.  We’re lucky enough that Jed had a connection to get us un without paying the cover.  Sometimes we’d go to the Exchange, our old sponsor bar first, sometimes we’d be at the fields too long and go straight to AdMo.  A few years later, and here we are. 

But here’s the deal:  you have to dress in costume.  You’ve had plenty of notice, so I trust that this won’t be an issue.  The more over-the-top, the better!  I know that Becky, Jed, and Chelsea are going crazy tonight.  I hope everyone else is too! 

Also, everyone has to create their own original band name.  See the previous blog post for ideas.  Creativity is both encouraged and appreciated!

BTW, we started Metal Mania years before VH1 started using it as a show and on CDs.  So they copied us, not the other way around.  Just wanted to set the record straight.

And there’s a story to tell your children someday. 

Metal Mania_Finnish 

Scouting Report:

 Tonight we play The Ballers at 6:30.  The Ballers are the d*ckhead maroon team that played the game before us last week.  They also are the team that pulled the “we have to play at 7:15, and because I’m cute and have an 8pm approintment, sorry, your game is over.”  Well, this homee don’t play dat.  That’s why I wanted to ref their game last week– to make sure that any close call wen’t against them.  You don’t want to be on an Italian’s bad side.  And they are.  OK, so they aren’t all d*ckheads.  But still, I want to slap them around like, well, like you slap around a d*ckhead. 

They aren’t a bad team, and they are completely beatable.  Their pitcher takes it kinda seriously, and their short stop can catch.  That’s about all I remember from that game.  That, and their catcher got PLOWED at how, and bounced up laughing it off (I thought she was crying and broke something, which has happened before).

It’s should be a tight game.  I bet it’ll be 3-2 us. 

Metal Mania_hands 

Captain’s Tip of the Day:

  • You pop out, you chug a cup of jungle juice.
  • You pop out 2x, you put a jell-o shot in a cup of jungle juice, then chug.
  • You pop out 3x, you make out with Russell. 
  • Remember to get the ball back to the pitcher ASAP.  We had a few extra bases taken on us last week because we didn’t follow this simple tip. 
  • Just the tip, just for a second, just to see how it feels, is ALWAYS a good idea. 
  • If the 3rd baseman goes in for a bunt, and there is a runner on 1st or 2nd base, it’s the short stop or left fielder’s responsibility to cover 3rd base.  It’s important to be aware of the situation.
  • If you are pitching, a little bounce to the pitch is a good thing–it makes them easier to pop up.
  1. your plant foot (the left one, if you kick with your right foot) should be next to the ball.  If it’s too far back, that likely means you’ll be leaning backward when you kick.  That is bad because…
  2. lean forward.  If you lean back, you will pop up 95% of the time.  don’t believe me?  Then believe this guy (he’s on YouTube, so it must be true): 
  3. ball should make contact either with your laces with your toe pointing down and your knee overtop the ball (for a power kick) or with your instep.  For a laces demo, see this video:  For the inside of the foot demo, check here: 
  4. Strike the ball at its midpoint or above.  This will direct the ball low.  If you stike it in the bottom part, it likely will pop up. 
  5. I’ve notices that most people (*ahem…girls*) STAND at the plate and wait for the ball to come to them.  Instead, try approaching the ball– just a few steps– then making contact.  This will do two things:  give the kick more power (think Newton:  equal and opposite reaction) and give you momentum towards first base, getting you there quicker. 
  6. Give it a shot tonight.  Can’t hurt to try, right?  We have 3 more regular-season games before the playoffs, so nows the time to practice. 

Metal Mania_tiger 

Action Item:  You Rockin’ Out with You C*ck Out?

Only one action item tonight becuase the theme and libations are taken care of:

Are you playing tonight?  Let me know.  Becky is bringing jungle juice and jell-o shots, and Kristin is bringing cookies.  Because even rock gods love home backed cookies.  And Jed still has a connection, so we’ll go to where 80’s Dance Night now is held, 18th & Red (the old Angry Inch) in AdMo.  Whether or not we go to McFaddens first will be a game time decision.  If we kick the jungle juice early, we likely will (it’ll be hysterical to see evenyone in costume there playing flip cup).  If not, we’ll head straight out. 

 Metal Mania_radio

Posted in kickball | 9 Comments »

Sign of Good Things to Come

Posted by Ren McCormack on July 9, 2009


Tonight we return from what I’m sure was a long Independence Day weekend full of alcohol, fireworks, and hangovers.  Well, at least mine was. 

I have a good feeling about tonight’s game.  Why?  Because as I was shaving this morning “Separate Ways” from Journey came on the radio.  If what wasn’t a sign, then I don’t know what is.  On a completely separate and unrelated note, I do not advising trying to sing Steve Perry while holding sharp objects.  *ouch

Action Item 1:  You Playin’ or What?

The scouting report on tonight’s foe, Angry Jays Army, looks like this:  the Army is a verteran team who joined the 2nd year of the division and went to the championship game that year.  They are a constant contender for the Silver Spur (championship trophy), so you know they are one of the better teams.  So bascially, we need to bring our A game.  So shake of the weekend hangover and get ready for a great game.  We play at 7:15, but plan to arrive around 7pm if possible. 

Captain’s Tip of the Day:

  • If you pop up, you owe the team 10 pushups or one shotgunned beer.  Your choice. 
  • Their pitcher, Joe, has a wicked cuve to his pitches.   Think bowling style.  As always, you do not need to kick the first or even 2nd pitch– wait for one that you like.  I personally get amped and want to kick the first pitch and need to tell myself to relax.  If you have boobs, he may give you one or two fast pitches, but he’ll slow it down if you’re about to strike or foul out.  If you have kibbles & bits, don’t expect the same curteousy. 
  • Keep in mind that it’s easier to get an out by throwing it to the teammate covering the base, not at the runner. 
  • If you play 2nd base (ladies), this means that you stand equidistant from 1st and 2nd base.  We’re not very good at this. 
  • If you play shallow center, then you are the person who takes throws to 2nd base.  You do not need to stand on the base–standing a few steps back should allow you enough time to get the base and to cover kicks to shallow center field. 
  • Outfielders, remember to use your cut offs. 

Action Item 2:  Libations

Who’s bringing the liquid fun tonight?  That’s another reason to arrive early–to put a few down. 

Action Item 3:  Theme

Tonight’s theme will be 80s products.  OOOOHHHH…a tough one you say.  Well, there is this really fancy invention called Google that you can use.  And I would counter that this is an easy theme, because it can be just about anything. 

Socail Calendar:

Friday Night:  Legwarmers at the State Theater.  I sent an e-mail about this. 

July 16:  METAL MANIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

July 20-August 10:  Screen on the Green   Note that the full list of movies has been released! 

August 22:  End-of-Season party.  Save the date now. 

Metal Mania Update:

AS you should know, next week is Metal Mania VI.  After Halloween and Happy Yuengling, this is my favorite time–dare I say holiday–of the year.  And no, I’m not joking.  I don’t joke about things this serious. 

You know the basics:  come up with your own costume (the more over the top, krimped, spiked, spandexed, and outragious the better), band name (must be an original, not an actual band), and overall persona.  If you don’t want to ride Metro in full 80s regalia, there is a rest room behind the “hill top” field that you can change in.   AFTER the games, stay in costume, cuz we’re gonna tear the town up like your name is Tommy Lee and it’s 1983 on the Sunset Strip.  We’re not sure if we’ll stay at McFaddens or use that as a launching point to another bar with an 80s nigt (we used to go to Heaven & Hell in AdMo, who has since discontinued it). 

I can’t wait to see all the crazy costumes and band names that you all created.  I’ve heard rumors or cod pieces, spiked leather dog collars, and mullet wigs.  Personally, I’m thinking of sporting leather pants, so I hope that it’s not 90 degrees with 90% humidity.  Even if it is, my ass simply looks too good in them to not wear them.    

In addition to your feather boas and Aerosmith-inspired unitards, each of you should come up with your fictitious band name.  Use these classics as inspiration:  Dokken, Guar, Danger Kitty (a fake one), Faster Pussycat, Warrant, Ratt, LA Guns, Bon Jovi, Def Leppard, Whitesnake, Moterhead, Stryper, Poison, Motley Crue, Fat Guy Trio, King Cobra, Twisted Sister, Quiet Riot, Slaughter, Clay Aiken, Spinal Tap, and Skid Row.    If you can’t come up with your own name, try combining parts of 2 of the above bands.  For example, Quiet Tap or Twisted Poison.  

Need some inspiration?  Use the websites:

Which 80s Hair Band Are You?

VH1: stations/hair_band/station.jhtml

 Hair Metal Confidential:


Metal Sludge, premier Glam Metal site & community:

 Sleaze Roxx, band bios:

Glam Metal, news & interviews:

Someday love will find you

Break those chains that bind you

One night will remind you

If he ever hurts you

True love won’t desert you

You know I still love you

I love you girl

I really love you girl

Posted in kickball | 12 Comments »

Bye Week? Byte Me.

Posted by Ren McCormack on June 25, 2009

Post-Game Wrap-up:

Last week was a tough loss.  I forget the score, but it was around 4-1.  Our downside was our kicking—we got maybe one kick out of the infield.  I don’t know if we were trying too hard or if the ball was filled with sand, but the gods of kicking were not on our side last week.  That said, at tonight’s game let’s try to work on our kicking—keeping the ball low, finding the holes, or simply not popping up (EMILY).  Heck, try a toe ball. 

Action Item 1:  Who’s Coming?

Please respond if you’re coming so that we know how many people to expect.  It’ll be a loosey-goosey game tonight because it’s just a scrimmage.  Game time is 7pm, so try to arrive—as you always should—15 min early.  So that we don’t take a field from a team that actually is scheduled to play, we are going to meet on the field back by the restrooms off the pond (aka, the goose poop field).  As a bonus, Chris offered to lead us in stretching exercises. 

Action Item 2:  Beer

Who’s bringing beer, cups, ice? 

Action Item 3:  Theme

We’ve done 80s movie characters, TV characters, and cartoons.  This week, let’s go 80s toys. 

Social Calendiary:

Friday, July 26:  Footloose is playing at the Rosslyn Outdoor Film Festival (  Kristin asked what time to meet.  I say 7:30.  That leaves plenty of time to get home, change, eat or pick up food to bring, grad a bottle of wine (and a cup!) and head down.  Action Item 4:  Who’s coming to the movie?  We need to know how much space to save.  Afterwards, we can walk across the street to The Continental, a cool, retro pool hall (albeit, not cheap pool). 

July 1:  “The DC Improv Comedy School Cast” on Wednesday at 7:00pm at The DC Improv Comedy Club.   Our very own Aaron Pease will perform.  $10 cover, plus 2 drinks (no problem there!)

July 9:  Metal Mania!

July 10-12:  The All Good Music Festival in Masontown, WV.  Tix are $140 for the weekend.  You camp out, drink beer, and listen to good tunes. 

July 20-August 10:  Screen on the Green,1044011.html

August 22:  End-of-Season party.  Save the date now. 

Odds n’ Ends:

Remember to reply to the four (not just the usual 3) action items. 

At special request, I posted pics from last year’s Metal Mania so you can get an idea of how over-the-top we got.  Rule of thumb for Metal Mania:  too far is not far enough!  July 9 is this year’s meyheim, so start getting your costume ready now!  Like I said at the game, Journeys and Hot Topic have a lot of cheesy 80s stuff that, apparently, is back in fashion with the tweeners.  Thrift shops like Goodwill also are gold mines.  Ebay too. 

Finally, see the e-mail below from the Division. Note that the date of the end-of-season party is being set now to encourage a better turnout:

Hey Kickballers,

This may be the first Thursday that I’m not refreshing every 5 minutes to see if we are going to be able to play. Obviously, it is a beautiful day so we are playing.

Just some info on the playoffs/end of seaon party.

– The playoffs will start on Aug. 6th and the Semis/Championship game will be on Aug 20th. – The top 4 seeded teams will have byes the first week – The 12th and 13th seeds will have a 3 inning play-in on Aug. 6th to see who gets to be in the playoffs. They will then play the 5th seed later that night. – End of the season party will be Aug. 22nd. Bar TBD.

I wanted to thank Footloose, Kickin Nuggets, a few memebers from Flippin Sweet and Damien for coming out on Saturday. Between the 25-30 of us we took down 4.5 kegs, which I think is pretty impressive.

See ya tonight, Julie

Don’t have to be so exciting
Just tryin’ to give myself a little bit of fun yeah
You always look so invitin’, you ain’t as green as you are young
Hey baby, it’s you, come on, girl, now, it’s you
Sink your teeth right through my bones, baby, let’s see what we can do
Come on and make it

Hurt so good
Come on baby, make it hurt so good
Sometimes love don’t feel like it should
You make it hurt so good

Hurts So Good – John Cougar

A Little Something About Johnny C:

I thought I’d throw out a few facts about this Grammy award-winning, Rock & Roll Hall of Fame artist (look at that, I already threw out 2 facts!):

  • Co-founder of Farm Aid
  • His first hit (reaching #28 on the charts), I Need a Lover, was covered by Pat Bennetar
  • His early albums were under the name Johnny Cougar or John Cougar, or John Cougar Mellencamp against his wishes
  • His wife, Elaine Irwin, is a former model and a serious hottie

Posted in kickball | 12 Comments »

(I’m so cool that I don’t need a title for this post)

Posted by Ren McCormack on June 18, 2009

Update (3:55pm):  Games tonight are ON!


I’m back from my week in Orlando.  I heard that last week was a little rough, score-wise.  Vandy is one of the better teams on the field (they won the division a few year’s back) and on the flip cup table.  Sorry that I missed it. 

This week’s game is at 6:30 vs. We Got The Runs. 

Scouting Report:

We Got The Runs was the doo-doo brown team from last season.  They were traditionally the absolute worst team in the division—but a lot of fun.  This year, they have a new captain and a lot of new players.  Bottom line:  they aren’t the same ol’ crappy team (get it?!). 

This is the fun green team that we’ve spent most nights at McFaddens playing flip cup against. 

Action Item 1:  You In?

Please respond whether (OR NOT) you can make the game.  As a reminder, if you don’t respond and show up, you are relegated to the bottom of the kicking order and likely won’t start in the field the first inning (so you get less playing time). 

Weather Report:

The weather looks nice this afternoon, but there is a 30% chance of thunderstorms from 6pm on.  What does that mean?  You can bet your britches that the games will not be cancelled before you leave work.  We DO play in light rain, so don’t be scared off.  I have ½ the team’s cell #s, the other ½ should give it to me tonight.  Mine is 703.967.9145.  Call or shoot me a text if you aren’t certain.  Rule of thumb:  always assume the game is on.  The possibility of rain also means that we’ll likely try to actually start the game on time so that both games can get in before any rain starts.  So show up on time. 

Captain’s Tip of the Day:

  • The easiest out if a pop fly.  So let’s not pop up.  We don’t need to score on every kick.
  • I’m going to slightly change up positions.  The shallow center fielder from now on will take throws to 2nd base.  The person playing this position should still stand a few steps behind the base itself.  You’ll have time to get there to make the catch, I promise.  The gal playing 2nd base actually stands in between 1st and 2nd base.  If you are not sure where to stand, just ask a vet. 
  • Similarly, the short stop splits the difference between 2nd base and 3rd base. 
  • If the ball is bouncier than you’d like—don’t kick it!  You get 3 strikes before you are out, so you can be a little picky with pitches.  I know that I get excited to kick and swing at the first ball pitched.  But it may be better to wait for a nicer pitch. 
  • Usually the team that makes the fewest errors wins.
  • A typical error is to throw the ball around when runners are advancing.  It’s a judgment call, but sometimes its better to cut your losses and get the ball back to the pitcher.  For example, if the ball is overthrown at 1st and the runner is proceeding towards 2nd.  The 1st baseman or right fielder (who should be backing up 1st base on all throws) then tried to peg them at 2nd, but miss.  The ball rolls into the outfield.  The runner then goes for third.  The center fielder comes in and tries to peg them at 3rd, even though it would be a close play.  They miss.  The runner then scores on what should have been a single.  Like a said, it’s a judgment call, but perhaps it would have been best to eat the ball (yummy) and get the ball to the pitcher. 

Shirts & Schwag:

I’ll have the rest of the shirts there tonight.  I’m tired of lugging them, so grab yours or have a friend take it if you can’t make it. 

As with every game, I have a bag o’ schwag – HELP YOURSELF!  I don’t hand it out—it’s up to you to help yourself.   I also have a running list of those who have floated me a few bucks…so I know those who haven’t paid yet…try to get me tonight or the next game you make.  Make sure that I check you off my list.  Then add your cell # to the list. 

Action Item 2:  Libations

Who’s bringing beer, cups, and a trash bag tonight?  No one should have to double up during the course of a season or playoffs. 

Action Item 3:  Theme

Two games ago we didn’t actually get to do 80s cartoon characters cuz only 5 of us showed up.  So let’s repeat that one. 

Midseason Party & Flip Cup Tourney:

As you know, Saturday is the mid-season party and flip cup tournament.  Becky R sent out an e-mail to get a head count.  She has not heard from Becky S, Eric, or Brianne.  We have 2-3 openings to fill with either teammates or FOFs (Friends of Footloose).  If there is enough interest, we can always fill another team with FOFs.  It’s only $10 FREE for DCK members, and $20 $10 for non-DCKers.  That’s a pretty good deal for 10 kegs of beer and chicken fingers.  I would bet that we’ll bar hop around AdMo too that night, so it’ll probably be a really fun and ridiculously drunk night.  I hope you can make it!  If you can’t make the flip cup part of the day/night, you could always meet us out later (though we’ll probably be pretty goofy by then). 

Next 2 Weeks:

We have a bye week next week.  And that really sucks.  Seems that with the rain and holidays that this season doesn’t have much flow.  So, I plan to line up a scrimmage against one of the other teams that has a bye.   So we’ll still get a game in and a regular Thursday night at the bar.  So plan ahead! 

In two weeks is the Independence Day holiday, so no games. 

Metal Mania!

We’re only going to do one costume event this year:  create your own 8os metal hair band, otherwise known as Metal Mania.  It will be in July, so start thinking about your costume.  The more over the top and outrageous, the better.  I was hitting on high school girls at Hot Topic and Journeys last weekend, and they had a TON of 80s garb—Madonna-style gloves, neon, and general cheesiness.  Both stores would be a good resource.  Thrift shops like Goodwill always have good stuff too. 

Social Calendar:

Friday, July 26:  Footloose (the movie…duh…) is playing at the Rosslyn Outdoor Film Festival (  I’ve been to a few of these.  They are smaller than Screen on the Green, but you still can bring a picnic dinner, adult beverage of choice, and watch a movie at dusk.  I think we should make it a team outing (as Brianne previously suggested in a blog post).  

July 10-12:  The All Good Music Festival in Masontown, WV.  Tix are $140 for the weekend.  You camp out, drink beer, and listen to good tunes.  Any interest?  As a bonus, you get to meet my brother and sister.

Mondays, July 10-Aug. 10:  Screen on the Green thankfully was able to get new sponsors after AOL dropped out.  Word on the street is that they will do 4 movies instead of the usual 5 because of the short planning time this year.  The first flick is Close Encounters of the Third Kind.  This is one of my favorite summer events in DC (after kickball, naturally).  It’s great to get there early, set up a blanket, eat dinner and drink a bottle of wine (yea, I’m a lush like that…but it’s over several hours), and watch a movie with the Capitol as the backdrop.  It gets crowded, so get there early.  More info to come.,1044011.html

Unknown Date:  Party at Aaron’s and my place!

Unknown Dates:  Other weekend trip ideas kicked around were a camping trip to Assateague Island and tubing in WV then camping out. 


Well,  that’s enough info for now.  See you tonight, rain or shine! 


Say you don’t know me, or recognize my face
Say you don’t care who goes to that kind of place
Knee deep in the hoopla, sinking in your fight
Too many runaways eating up the night

Marconi plays the mamba, listen to the radio, don’t you remember
We built this city, we built this city on rock an’ roll

We built this city, we built this city on rock an’ roll
Built this city, we built this city on rock an’ roll

— We Built This City, Starship

What can I say about Starship?  The founders of Jefferson Airplane took a monumental San Francisco psychedelic band from the 60s and created one of the absolute worst songs of all time. 

Posted in kickball | 14 Comments »

Here Kitty Kitty…

Posted by Ren McCormack on June 4, 2009

UPDATE (4:22 pm): 

Because of how our schedule works out we will not be making up games that are rained out. Therefore, since games will be rained out tonight WE WILL STILL HAVE A MATCH UP…at McFaddens. We’ll have a flip-cup competition… Here’s how it will go down … and these games WILL COUNT in the standings.

Each team playing at the 6:30 time slot will arrive at McFaddens ready to take on their scheduled opponent in flip cup. We’ll play with the usual “players” and play 7 rounds. Teams can substitute in and out between rounds. The best of 7 will get the win and the score (ex: 4-3, 5-0, etc.) will be entered into the system as the result of this week’s games. Teams playing at 7:15, please plan to show up to McFaddens by 7 – although the earlier the better so you can cheer on the 6:30 teams. Please also note that we are still keeping the rule in effect from last year that if you forfeit more then 2 games you will not be in the playoffs.

I know this is completely different then what we have done any other year but I think it’s going to be fun. We were all planning on playing kickball today anyway so we might as well get together and have some fun.

Just a little incentive to get everyone out (besides the whole having to forfeit thing)…we will be buying a keg for the “scheduled” flip cup games. That way no one has to put up money for their game. After your scheduled game is finished you are on your own. If there is beer left over from the 7:15 games that will be for anyone that wants it.

See ya tonight!

Ren says– game on!  let’s get there at 6:30 ready to play some flip cup!  see you at McFadden’s, Footloose!

Post-Game Wrap-Up:

Last week’s game was a mess.  Only Jed, Heath, Chris, Chelsea, and myself actually made the game.   The other team was short people too, so we each picked up players from the late game and played anyway.  Now, it’s disputed whether we squeezed 2 or 3 innings in, but either way we pretty much crushed them.  Then the late teams walked away because they thought it *very* important to actually start at 7:15.  I wish someone whould explain to those tards (to use the word of the week from the previous post) how daylight savings time works.  Ladies, let me give you a hint:  as a dude, I don’t care how cute you are, if you’re rude and unbending, you’re written off in my book.  You hear that Kate from the red team?  Cuz I’m talking about you.  “I have to be somewhere at 8pm, so we have to start now.”  Well you know what, I’m glad your team got smoked.  Thanks to Chris for sucking it up to ref that game, cuz I didn’t want to be around those hosers. 

No, I’m not bitter.

OK, now for our ladies that showed up, but didn’t find us, there is a 3rd field that is hidden from site back bay the restrooms.  That’s where we were.  Chances are, that even if we officially forfeit, we still will srimmage and hang our till the beer is kicked.  SO, if you’re late, come find the smoke grey team.

ALSO, I have a sign up sheet– I need everyone’s cell #s.  I couldn’t contact anyway about the game because I didn’t have any #s. 

LASTLY, we should have forfeited the game.  Thankfully, the other team was cool and let us pick up players.  Not every team will be that cool.  So you know, 3 forfeits and we are not allowed to play in the end-of-season tournament.   

Scouting Report:

Tonight (6.4) at 6:30 we play Tony’s Tigers, once of the few original teams in the division (the others being us and next week’s foe, Vandalay Industries; though you could argue that Legion of Doom’s liniage makes them an original team).  The Tigers regularaly have a lot of turnover because they are a work team.  That said, they always seem to take it pretty seriously, so expect a competitive game.  Their pitcher last week seemed pretty into the world of competitive kickball.  But he doesn’t rock a headband the same as I do. 

I may be running late, so Jed and Becky will get things started if I’m not there on time (just give me a little leeway (sp?) please!). 

Captain’s Tip of the Day:

  • We need to get runners on base to score.  That’s some pretty advanced math, I know.  Pop outs are easy, so try to keep the ball low.
  • I’m going to change up positions a little bit– the “shallow center” position takes all throws to 2nd base (special situations notwithstanding).  The 2nd base position splits the difference between 1st and 2nd.  Ladies- I usually play you in these positions, so read that again.
  • IF the team bunts, I may put a male catcher in.  We’ll make that adjustment after the 1st inning.  The starting catcher needs to be prepared for bunters and either throw the ball to the pitcher or to 1st base. 
  • It’s going to be slippery tonight, so be cautious rounding bases (esp. at 2nd).  

Rain Policy:

If you do not receive  an e-mail from me or the division stating that games are cancelled, always assume that they are on.  I will text you only if games are called off due to weather.  The worst that can happen is you get a little wet and a lot drunk.  My cell is 703.967.9145. 

Action Item 1:  Who’s In?

Do you plan to make tonight’s game?  If you say yes, you’d better come (*cough…LEIGH…cough*). 


Thanks to Carrie and Kolaleh for getting us tipsy tonight.

Action Item 2:  Theme

This week’s theme is 80s cartoon characters. 

Here comes the rain again
Falling on my head like a memory
Falling on my head like a new emotion
I want to walk in the open wind
I want to talk like lovers do
I want to dive into your ocean
Is it raining with you

So baby talk to me
Like lovers do
Walk with me
Like lovers do
Talk to me
Like lovers do

Posted in kickball | 10 Comments »

Game 2: Can You Say, “Winning Streak?”

Posted by Ren McCormack on May 28, 2009


Thursday at 6:30 we (hopefully) will continue our winning tradition when we take on Terroist Foot Jab.

Scouting Report:

TFJ is a new team to the division, so I have zippy scouting report data other than their name is simply retarded.  To any teammates that are offended that I used the word “retarded,” well, tough noogies.  This is a team from the 80s when the tards went flying before PC only meant “personal computer.”  You know, like a Commodore 64.  Which, by the way, I totalled kicked ass on while playing Montezuma’s Revenge in the 3rd grade. 

In summary, TFJ are tards. 

Action Item 1:  Attendance

Who’s in for Thursday’s game?  Remember to reply whether or not you can make it. 

Captain’s Tip of the Day:

Being too lazy to read what I wrote for last game, I’m just going to wing it this week:

  • You don’t have to kick the crap out of the ball.  You’ll probably just pop out anyway.  Kinda like I did 2x last game.  There’s nothing wrong with a respectible kick on the ground.   
  • We got a pretty cheap out last game when the girl on 1st from Legion of Doom ran to 2nd when there was a pop fly.  We through the ball back to 1st base and turned a double play.  There are a few lessons in this scenario.  First, if you are on base and there is a pop fly, don’t take off in a full sprint to the next base.  Go part way to see if the ball is caught or dropped.  If it’s caught, then you still have time to run back to your original base.  If it’s dropped, then run to the next base.  The next lesson is that the other team’s first base coach did not do his/her job in telling the runner what to do. 
  • Speaking of base coaches, let’s make sure that we always have one at first and one at third.  The main job of the base coaches is to help out the runners by telling them when to run (like the scenario above), how many outs there are, etc.  The first base coach helps the kicker and runner on 1st, the third base coach helps the runners on 2nd, 3rd, and tell any subsequent runners whether to stay at third, run home, duck, dip, dive, dodge, duck, slide,  jump, or otherwise avoid a thrown ball.  When you are a base runner, listen for the instructions of your coaches.  If you’re not sure what to do, ask them.  For base coaches, I’ll look to the team (particularly the vets who know what they are doing) to help coach bases. 
  • Here’s a hint on catching a big, red, rubber ball:  it’s easier to accept the ball to your bosom palms up than to catch it like you are bumping a volley ball above your head. 
  • When kicking, the strike zone is 1 foot to either side of home plate and 1 foot above the plate.  You do not need to kick every pitch.  If it’s not near the plate or too bouncy, just wait for the next pitch.  You have 3 strikes and 3 (NOT 4!) fouls before you are out.  If the pitcher throws 4 balls, you get a walk (or you get to take 1st base). 
  • Lastly, get the ball back to the pitcher ASAP unless you are trying to make an out–otherwise the ball is still in play and runners may continue to advance. 

Action Item 2:  Theme

This week’s theme is 80s TV characters.  When you reply to the blog, include your character (but only if you plan to attend–we don’t want you steeling any good ones if you can’t make it!).  There was one tard last game *cough…Tom…cough* who thought that 80s movies really meant 80s TV.  For your tardiness, you have to pick a new name. 

Also, remember to fill out your name tag with both your 80s name and your real name so that we all get to know each other. 

Action Item 3:  Libabtions

Who will step up and bring libations and cups this week?  Please bring enough for the entire team (so a 12 pack won’t cut it).  I supplied 2 cases and cups last week.  We have enough people on the team that we can rotate drink duties and should never have to repeat. 

Misc. Joo Joo

Thanks to everyone who dropped me some duckets for schwag.  To the others– I’m keeping a list and checking it twice. 

Actually, regarding the list, if everyone could add their cell #s, I’d appreciate it.  I’ll need them in case of rainouts. 

Is it wrong that a grown man just bought 144 jelly bracelets?  Well, methinks not.  They will be in the Bag o’ Schwag.   As with every game, HELP YOURSELVES to the purple Bag o’ Schwag. 

I see you, and you see me
But you’re blowin’ the lines
When you’re making a scene
Oh girl, you’ve got to know
What my head overlooks
The senses will show to my heart
With its watchingful eyes
You can’t escape my

Private eyes
They’re watching you
They see your every move
Private eyes
They’re watching you
Private eyes
They’re watching you watching you watching you watching you

–Private Eyes, Hall & Oates


A little something about Hall & Oates:

The top selling act of the 1950s:  Elvis

1960s:  The Beatles

1970s:  Elton John

1980s?  You guessed it, Philadelphia’s own Hall and Oates.  Bust that one out next time you’re playing the 80s edition of Trivial Pursuit

Posted in kickball | 23 Comments »

Post-Game Wrap-up

Posted by Ren McCormack on May 21, 2009

We had a great start to the season, defeating Legion of Doom 4-1.  If I remember correctly, Kristin scored half our runs–precisely why I made her the lead-off kicker.

The game ball for this game goes to Jed, who was like a vaccuum at 3rd base.  Jed- remember to iron on your all star badge.

There are no games this week because of Memorial weekend.  Instead, the division is sponsoring a happy hour at the Clarendon Ballroom rooftop.  I’ll probably be there around 6-6:30, but show up whenever you can.  Today should be in the high 70s–perfect for a rooftop bar.  Who’s in?  (hint:  that’s a cue to post a comment.)

Next week we play Terrorist Foot Jab, a new team in the division, at 6:30.

If I don’t see you tonight, see you next week.  If you’re around this weekend, I’m sure we’ll grab beers Saturday night.

Posted in kickball | 8 Comments »

Are You Ready for Some KICKBALL?

Posted by Ren McCormack on May 11, 2009

Action Item No. 1:

Please let me know whether (or not) you will be at Thursday’s 7:15 game against the Legion of Doom.

Scouting Report:

Don’t let the name fool you—there’s nothing scary about this team (except maybe the amount of beer that they consume over the course of a game).  For the vets, the Legion was once known as Bunt Funk (formerly Grabbasky and the K-funk Allstars, formerly Schoolhouse Rockers, formerly After School Specials…wow…that’s more team history than I think 99.9% of their actual team knows…).

We have a fun rivalry against this team.  The past few seasons we’ve traded 1-run victories.  Unfortunately, I think we’ve come out on the short end of most of those trades.  This is a game of bragging rights…and dem are some rights that I want (particularly because I’m friends with most of their team).

This will be a fun one.

Captains Tip of the Day:

Each week, I’ll give a few tips and rules to help the people who haven’t played since they were in Ms. Smith’s 4th grade class (and tidbits for the vets to remember).  First off, nine times out of ten, the team that loses makes more mistakes than the other team.  I’ll start with basic stuff and work up to more complex things.

  • The easiest out in kickball is a pop fly.  To remedy the fever of a popfly, drink two Miller Lites, KICK THE BALL ON THE GROUND, and call me in the morning.
  • Positions are basically the same as baseball/softball, except that you can play 11 people in the field.  We play 5 outfielders, with one of them in “shallow center,” about 5 steps behind 2nd base.  I’ll have a chart at the field.  Seriously.
  • The rules are basically the same as baseball/softball rules, with a few execptions, such as:
  1. Balls, strikes, and foul balls are each counted separately. Three fouls = an out (VETS:  note that this is different than WAKA).
  2. You can throw the ball at someone to get them out, but you cannot hit them in the head.  If a runner is hit in the head, they are safe (unless they were sliding or intentionally moved to create a head shot).
  3. There is no infield fly rule.  Don’t know what that is?  Don’t worry about it.
  4. No leading or stealing (but tagging up is allowed…and encouraged).
  • When we are on D, get the ball back to the pitcher ASAP.  Otherwise, the base runners may continue to round the bases.
  • While bunting is allowed, I don’t particularly encourage it.  Girls can bunt if they want, but there most certainly will not be any munting (male bunting).  The colors don’t munt!
  • Last tip for this week:  run through first base.  You do not need to stop on dime.  Instead keep running past the base (after touching it, of course), then turn to your right into foul territory.  “But why, Captain o’ Captain, would I do this?”  The advantage of running through the base is that you can keep a full head of steam and not lose any momentum trying to stop on the base.
  • Ok, I lied—one more tip:  we should provide base coaches at 1st and 3rd, and they need to help the base runners with # of outs, when to run part way (such as pop ups), when to tag up, etc.


Each week, we have to supply a ref for the game the opposite time as ours.  For example, this week we have a 7:15 game, so we need to supply a ref for the 6:30 game.  I plan to get to the fields for the 6:30 game, so I’ll handle our reffing responsibility this week.

When we play at 6:30, we also need to supply a “squatter” at the fields because the NPS does not issue permits for the area of the Mall where we play.  We compete for space with softball, so it’s important that people get down there early.  Unfortunately, I won’t be able to get out of work on time to make it, so we’ll ask for volunteers each early game.

Failure to supply either may result in a forfeit.  Three or more forfeits and we are disqualified from the end-of-season tournament.  Not to sound dire—it likely won’t happen, but it could.


Each week, I’ll ask for volunteers to bring liquid refreshments, cups, and ice to the game.  That way, we rotate responsibilities.  And that doesn’t mean that you can simple call “cups” to fullfill your drunkenly duties…

I have a couple of cases of Miller Lite all lined up for this week.  Aren’t I good to you?


Each week we’ll have a different name tag theme.  We’ll have 2 costume nights (Metal Mania and Halloween in July).  This week’s theme is an easy one:  80s movie characters.  When you reply to the blog, post your character so that we don’t have any dupes.   I’ll have name tags and other goodies at the games.  Please take the initiative to fill out your name tag with both your real name and your 80s character; also, help yourself to the goodies.


Like I said in my first post, I ask that everyone float me a few bucks for the goodies.  Make sure that I cross your name off the list so that you get credit.  I’ll also ask you to add your cell # so that I can text you should games be cancelled (the division will e-mail by 4:30 if games are cancelled because of weather, but sometimes it changes between 4:30 and game time).

See you Thursday night!  Remember to show up early, get your shirt, socks, nametag, and goodies (and a beer).

PS- Remember to respond to the Action Items

I’m always workin slavin every day
Gotta get away from that same old same old
I need a chance just to get away
If you could hear me think this is what Id say

Don’t need nothin but a good time
How can I resist
Aint lookin for nothin but a good time
And it dont get better than this

A little something about Poison:

The band has sold over 25 million albums worldwide. Bret Michaels and Rikki Rockett had a band called Spectres, in 1982 when they were still in high school. Poison started out with about 10 members and anyone was invited to join if they played an instrument. If a member failed to show for practice, they were out of the band. Eventually they had four or five members who were steady members. The Poison band was first started in 1983 and they called themselves, Paris at that time. Bret Michaels was lead vocalist, Matt Smith, guitar player, Bobby Dall, Bass player, and Rikki Rockett, was the drummer. The band moved to LA in March, 1984 and began to play the clubs. After an a mad group of parents protested that rock music was poisoning the minds of their children, the band changed their name to poison. The band had theatrical live shows and a glam image and this gained them notoriety on Sunset Strip. The filled the stage with old Harley Davidsons and car parts because they didn’t have the money to buy effects for their act. Bret, Bobby, Rikki, and DeVille, all signed with the Enigma Records label, in 1986, for about $30,000. Their debut album was released in 1986 and was called, Look What the Cat Dragged In. From the album came the singles, Cry Tough, Talk Dirty To Me, I Want Action, and I Won’t Forget You. They sold over 2 million copies of the album. In 1987, the band recorded a cover of the song, Rock and Roll All Nite, for the soundtrack to the movie, Less Than Zero.

Poison released their second album called, Open Up and Say …Ahh!. The album sold over 8 million copies worldwide. From the album came the group’s biggest hit single called, Every Rose Has It’s Thorn. Other hits from the album were, Your Mama Don’t Dance, Nothin’ But A Good Time, and Fallen Angel. By the end of 1989, Poison had become the fourth best selling hard rock band in the 1980’s.

Also,  they grew up 20 min from were I did.  And I met Bret Michaels mom at a Christmas party.  HA!

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Kickball Is Here!

Posted by Ren McCormack on May 6, 2009


Welcome to the 2009 season!

We’ve got a full roster that’s a mix of vets and newbies.   So if you don’t know everyone, that’s fine (because neither do I!).

To get to know each other before the season starts and to see what this kickball stuff is all about, we’re going to have a pre-season pickup games and party THIS THURSDAY.  We’ll meet at the usual fields at 6:30 to have some informal games and a ref clinic for anyone interested in helping out ref this year (note: each week, we have to provide a ref for the game preceding/after our game).  Then we’ll head to our new sponsor bar, McFaddens, for FREE BEER, dinner, and flip cup. I f it is still raining come Thursday, head straight to McFaddens.

For the newbies on the team, Thursday night will be a good night to meet people and get a few practice kicks under your belt.  If you don’t know me, please find me to introduce yourself.  I’m the short, devilishly handsome man with a shaved head who likely is bouncing around talking to lots of people.  Did you see the words “FREE BEER” above?  What else do you need.  At the door, just let the wristband lady know that you’re with kickball.


* ALL games on Thursday nights starting at either 6:30 or 7:15. I have NOT received the schedule yet. I’ll send it once I do.

* Games will start next Thursday. * We still will play on the Mall near the Vietnam memorial (20th/Constitution). The closest Metro is Foggy Bottom, and is a 10-15 min walk. Use the pick-up games this Thursday as a test run to see how long your commute will take. What are my expectations as the team captain?

* First and foremost, the only thing that I ask of each player is that they respond to the questions that I ask in the blog ( each week by posting a comment.  This will typically be something very complex such as “please let me know whether you will be at tonight’s game.”  Now let me be a snotball and give everyone a lesson in basic English.  The word “whether” expresses an alternative, as in “whether or not” (i.e., give me a yes or no answer).

* Next, read my weekly posts.  They will contain little tips of success and 80s trivia.  For example, what’s the first rule of kicking?  Just ask a veteran.  What’s the top selling album of 1983?   That should be a gimmy, as it’s also the world’s overall top selling album: Michael Jackson’s Thriller.

* If you do not respond to the blog letting me know that you are coming to a game and you show up, that’s cool, just know that you’ll be at the bottom of the kicking order.  Fair warning.

* Footloose strives to find a balance between being goofy and being competitive.  What’s that mean? Rock the wristbands, but still rock the other team.

Here are some other tidbits of info:

* Becky and Jed are again helping me organize and run things. (Hopefully I asked them…) The reality of work is that I expect to work longer hours over the summer and may have difficulty makes the early games on time.

* We will handle on-field drinks the same as last season: by rotating who supplies cups and drinks for each game.  The type of drink is up to you. A couple of 30 packs?  That’s cool. Sangria? That makes for a fun night. Jungle juice? Hells yea! Officially, drinking is not allowed on the Mall.  Officially, we do not drink on the Mall.  Just don’t ask what’s in the cups. Discretion (and cleaning up all trash) is key.

* I ask that each person give me $4 or $5 for miscellaneous expenses. And yes, I do keep note of who paid and who thinks I won’t notice when they don’t pay. * There will be a few games where we are responsible for taking an equipment bag and bringing it the following week. So I’m not stuck lugging the thing on the Metro, if anyone is driving and knows that they will be at the next game, I’d be very grateful if you step up and volunteer to take/bring it. We’ll cover that when it comes up.

* There will be at least two costume games this summer (other than our normal 80s garb, of course). Metal Mania VI and the league-sponsored “Halloween in July.” What’s Metal Mania? It’s your chance to flex a little creative muscle and use a lot of Hairnet. Basically, each team member creates their own 80s metal band personality and comes decked out and ready to rock. I have a couple ideas for Halloween in July, but more ideas are welcome. Last season we did 80s movie characters and the year before we did “Pretty in Pink” and wore bad prom dresses (even some of the dudes). Stayed tuned for future posts on both costume events. In the mean time, hit the local Goodwill and stock up on acid wash jeans and snakeskin vests.

* Shirts:  the color is picked. I’m not sure if they will arrive on time given that the order is just going out now. What’s the color? I’m not sure since I have a short list of choices, but it will be a new color this year.

LAST, but most importantly… Footloose is a team with a theme. If the name “Footloose” didn’t give it away, maybe this will: do you like jelly bracelets? Do you still wear tube socks with the stripes at the top? Do you still fall asleep with a Glow Worm tucked snuggly under your arm? Do you look Pretty in Pink? Because you know, and knowing is half the battle. Because you’re just a small town girl living in a lonely world. Because you’re Hungry Like the Wolf, you’ve joined a team that loves everything cheesy about the 80s. So get ready to do the Safety Dance, flip too many cups to count, and maybe, just maybe, play a little kickball.

That’s all from the news desk right now.


Ps- Live the blog. Love the blog. Save it as a favorite.

Posted in kickball | 4 Comments »

Beer, Randsoms, and Baseball

Posted by Ren McCormack on August 14, 2008



A few things:


1- check out the pics in Flickr and the e-mail copied below…funny shit.  someone swiped the boot (our division trophy) from the X after the championship game and sent randsom photots & demands.


2- End of Season party is THIS Saturday, 8/16 at Grand Central in Adams Morgan.  Starts at 8pm, and I suggest you *not* show up fashionably late to this one.  I hope that I don’t need to hype up this party. free beer speaks for itself.  Check out the End of Season Party Flyer.


3- Bunt Funk extended an offer to join them at the Nats game tonight (8/14).  I suspect that Thurs night happy hours will be a regular event.  anyone interested?


I hope to see you out saturday night.  the end-of-season parties are always a good time.




———- Forwarded message ———-
From: Long Beach Killers and Fur-Trappers <>
Date: Aug 13, 2008 3:59 PM
Subject: Das Boot
To whom it may concern (er…Amanda):We have your precious Silver Spur, and if you know what’s good for you, you will do 2 things:
1. Place $1 million dollars in unmarked bills into a silver briefcase and leave it at a location TBD at a later date, along with one blueberry Slurpee and a coupon for a free Hard Times chili dog with any purchase.
2. Distribute this email to the rest of the so-called “Atlantic” Division team captains for wider distribution. We want infamy, along with our million.
Hopefully we can get this taken care of so that the “rightful owners” of the Spur (i.e., Flippin’ Sweet) will have it to drink out of at the End of Season Party.

…that is, until the Federalis strike again!


The Long Beach Killers and Fur-Trappers





















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Sex and Victory

Posted by Ren McCormack on July 31, 2008

Post-Game Wrap-Up

Last week we escaped with a 3-1 victory over 13th seed, Kickin’ Nuggets.  Not to be a Debby Downer, but we had no offensive firepower and we made some questionable defensive plays.  To put it in perspective, Spin racked up 30+ runs on them the week before.   But in the tourny a win is a win, and we’re still alive.   In the end, the team that makes the fewest errors wins, and we came out on top. 


The tournament is single elimination, so is we loose, our season is done.  Good thing that we won’t lose.


Action Item 1:  RSVP

Respond whether or not you can make it to tonight’s 6:30 game vs We Got the Runs.     


Scouting Report

We beat the Runs earlier this year 7-0.  I actually ran into one of their players at the Nats game last night, and he was quick to point out that they were missing a lot of their good guy players at that game, so expect this to be a different team than the one we played before.  If we play like we have before, we will win.  If we play like we did last week, it’s anyone’s game. 


I was not a very good coach last week.  After watching their week firepower, I should have made mid-game adjustments.  I’ll strategerize better this week and move people around as needed. 


A plus for us is that PJ and Russell are back (despite Becky’s cruel prank, perpetrated by yours truly, that told them we lost).  A negative is that Tweety Pete is somewhere between here and Denver and Aaron is in NYC.    


The highest that Footloose has ever been was a 5 seed, and we have not made it past the semifinal round.  Should we win tonight, this will mark the farthest that we’ve ever made it.  Make it so. 


Captains Tip of the Day

          Don’t pop out, beotches.

          Re-read last week’s tips, which are gold Jerry, gold! 

          Kickers should wait for a nice pitch.   (yea, this was one from last week—so what?!)

          The infield needs to talk when there is a short grounder.  This usually affects the catcher, pitcher, and 3rd baseman.  It also could affect the 1st baseman (you know who you are).  Call it if it’s your ball; you may have to call off another player.  For example, if Jed is on 3rd, he may call off the pitcher because he has a straight line on the ball compared to the pitcher who has to collect the ball then turn 140 degrees to throw to 1st.  Also, the pitcher, catcher, and 3rd baseman need to communicate if they start bunting. 

          Base coaching  was suspect last week.   Runners:  listen to your coaches.  Coaches:  be vocal, load, and correct with your instructions (keeping in mind the runner’s capabilities). 



I’ll bring the beer, cups, & ice as long as you promise to bring home a victory.      


Action Item 2:  Theme

This week is a free-for-all.  Pick your own piece of 80s nostalgia.  It could be a toy, band, fad, tv/movie character—whatever you want! 


Social Calendar

  Screen on the Green is the next four Monday nights.  Even if you aren’t familiar with the movie (like me), they are fun/relaxing to sit on the Mall, eat, drink, and chat.  I’ll send and evite each Monday.    The upcoming movie is The Apartment.    In two weeks it’s the finale, Superman.   For the finale, you have to get there nice and early (I can only save so much real estate). 

  Aug. 21 is Brew at the Zoo.  Tix are $55 for non-members (*ouch!), but it’s fun and for a good cause.

– We should do a Footloose night at a Nats game on a Friday.  Because not a single person replied whether or not they had interest, I’m just going to plan it and send the details.   


Love and hope and sex and dreams
Pride and joy, fast cars, ice cream
Jet black hair, soft socks and shoes
Let’s fish around, free air again
Golden madness, feed off dead meat
Time not lost, but sold white teeth
We want victory, we want truth
A million stars move into view

Slender Fungus – Tones on Tail


Posted in kickball | 9 Comments »

Time to Put Out or Shut Up

Posted by Ren McCormack on July 24, 2008

Post-Game Wrap-Up

Last week we showed the league that we deserve the #4 seed as we took down the returning champs 9-1. Our offense was kicking and we had a pretty staunch D with few errors. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again—the team that makes the fewest errors wins. Jed locked down 3rd base, PJ showed his ballet technique with a nice petit allégro over a throw at 2nd, and Pete skipped the X to get laid. So all three were all stars.

We were seated inside for the first time all year. And what fun it was. Bunt Funk was kind enough to flash us for the promise of $5, then we had a flip cup royale vs. Vandy that came down to a team flip off (we won after starting out 2 cups behind). After trying to get Dance Party USA started at the bar, we took the party to Madhatter. The best part: both bars played the Kenny Loggin’s classic song, Footloose.

Action Item 1: RSVP

Tonight the tournament starts. Here’s how it works: it’s single elimination, which means one loss and your season is done. Jed sent the GMOT, which includes the bracket.

Respond whether or not you can make it tonight.

Jed agreed to squat, which I bet means that he’ll ref for us too.

Scouting Report

We are the 4 seed playing the 13 seed, Kickin’ Nuggets. Now the Nuggets got blasted by Spin the Bottle last week. But here’s the deal—anything can happen in the playoffs because teams take the games more seriously and actually try…I mean TRY! Last year Vandy won as the 6 seed and before that Tony’s Tigers came from 14 seed to get to the championship game before falling to Spin (their adrenaline was pretty much spent after the quarterfinal game).

Bottom line: I want to live to play another day, so let’s Kick them in the Nuggets then go drink at the bar.

After we win tonight, we will play next week at 6:30 against the winner of (likely) We Got the Runs (the 5 seed) and the Headhunters. If you want to know why that is likely, then read the GMOT.

Captains Tip of the Day

Kick the ball on the ground so that it can’t be caught for an easy out.

Get the ball back to the pitcher ASAP, even if there is commotion (for example, earlier in the season there was disagreement over whether someone was safe or out. As the bickering ensued, a smart runner on 3rd trotted home). So think out there as both a fielder and runner.

A big mistake that inexperienced teams make is throwing the ball around chasing a runner. Some times it’s better to cut your losses and get the ball back to the pitcher. For example, say we throw the ball to 2nd and miss. Then we try to peg him at 3rd and miss, and he scored. Meanwhile, the runner on first is now standing at 3rd base instead of 1st. It’s a judgment call, so just use your heads and listen to your teammates.

Right field: remember to back up throws to 1st; we don’t want to give up any free bases.

Whoever pitches, remember that a ball with a little bounce to it is easier for the kicker to pop up, so don’t make the pitches too smooth.

Kickers: you don’t have to kick every pitch. Wait for a nice one. You get 4 foul balls and 3 strikes before you are called out, so wait for a nice one.

Action Item 2: Libations

Who’s bringing the booze this week? If you haven’t brought it yet, time to step up! Some of us have brought 2x now. Remember to bring ice and cups too.

Action Item 3: Theme

This week’s theme is my all-time favorite. I don’t recall the exact origins, but 3 seasons ago we came up with the idea, and boy did it go a place I wasn’t expecting (which was very naïve of me). The theme? Create your own Care Bear. Much like the game Never Have I Ever, it doesn’t take long before people’s minds go to a dirty, dirty place. Ever since that first fateful year we introduced the theme, it’s become tradition to repeat it the first playoff game of the year.

My favorite story was from our little vet Alisa who now is in NYC for some crazy reason. I get an e-mail the next day that says something to the affect of, “So I’m on the metro on my way home at the end of the night and I realize that everyone is giving me strange looks. Now, I thought that it was because I was wearing a cool kickball shirt. Nope. I still had my Bend Me Over Bear name tag on.”

I can’t wait to see what you pervs come up with.

Goodbye to You

As you may know, we are loosing a stalwart of the Footloose dynasty. Our own little Pony Tail Pete is moving to the greener pastures of Denver and this will be his last game after 7 years on the team (tied for 2nd longest). So let’s send him off in style—with strippers and booze! Oh, and a victory.

Social Calendar

Friday Aaron is is haven’t a launch party for the literary journal he and his buddy’s manage. It’s a $10 cover for OPEN BAR. $15 to receive a copy of the journal and help him defray the cost of publishing. It’s a roller derby theme, and there will be real like roller derby chicks there. Is this in a dingy bar? Hells no! It’s in an art gallery. Check yo evite.

– You should have received Aaron/my evite for the party on the 26th. If not, let me know. Hope you can make it! Please RSVP so we know how many kegs to buy.

Screen on the Green is the next four Monday nights. Even if you aren’t familiar with the movie (like me), they are fun/relaxing to sit on the Mall, eat, drink, and chat. I’ll send and evite each Monday.

Aug. 21 is Brew at the Zoo. Tix are $55 for non-members (*ouch!), but it’s fun and for a good cause.

– We should do a Footloose night at a Nats game. Either a Friday, Saturday, or Sunday. I’m thinking Friday. Any interest?

Could I have loved someone like the one I see in you
I remember the good times baby now, and the bad times too
These last few weeks of holding on
The days are dull, the nights are long
Guess it’s better to say

Goodbye to you
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to you

–Goodbye to You, Scandal

Posted in kickball | 8 Comments »

Time to Heat Things Up

Posted by Ren McCormack on July 17, 2008

Post-Game Wrap-Up

Last week’s game got off to a veeeery late start bc the other team was waiting for their 4th gal. Now, we only had 3, but sssshhhh. But, she had shorts/sneaks/shirt for a guy, and they only had 8 or 9 people. That said, we crushed them, running up a score of 11-1 (and the 1 run was a give-me that they really didn’t earn, but more cause we weren’t paying attention and let them have it by the time we figured it out). With 1 out and 2 runners on base, there was a kick into right-center. I was playing deep cause the guy kicked a previous ball pretty deep. I ran in, collected it, and saw the guy running for 2nd. So I through the ball a good 5 feet in front of him, so when the ball got there, it bounced and hit him in the ass. Then Russell (?) threw it home for the 3rd out, saving the run. Oh, and we only played 3 innings, batting twice. Now that’s the offensive fire power that we need going into the playoffs!

The game ball goes to, well, anyone who hit a home run (too many to count).

Action Item 1: RSVP

Please let me know whether (or not…a lot of people forget that OR NOT part) at tonight’s 7:15 game vs Vandaley Industries. Let’s see if we can actually manage to get 4 gals out tonight. We lost V, but Zoli is back from her erotic journey from Milan to Minsk. Once the playoffs hit next week, we really need to have 4 gals so that we don’t have the threat of forfeit. No one has called us on it yet, but as we get deeper in the playoffs, some team will.

Hopefully I’ll be there to ref the early game.

Scouting Report

Vandy was the yellow team playing after us last week. They are the returning Silver Spur champs and have been in the league since it started in 2001. So they know how to play. They are one spot behind us in the standings and, according to Jed’s expert analysis, have zippy chance of catching us, so we are guaranteed at least a 4th seed. But let’s not get cocky. Having known their captains for 8 years, I fully expect them to bring it just to rub it in my face. They are a staunch anti-bunt team, so we don’t have to defend that. They lost last week because their D was a bit week. So we may be able to exploit that. But, that doesn’t give us free rain to bomb pop flies, which is the easiest way to get out. Their pitcher, bearded Brad, has a seriously wicked pitch—spinning, fast, and bouncy. Do NOT feel like you need to kick every pitch. You have 3 strikes, so pick a decent pitch to kick. And no, he won’t take it easier on you simply because you do not have a penis. That would be sexist. And that would be wrong. Also, one of their gals, April, is preggers, so she will kick and have a gal pinch runner. I’m ok with this. For those that remember ex-Footloosers Zeb and Erin, Brad and April are friends with them from Penn State.

Bottom line: this is one of the premier kickball teams when they want to be. They don’t have a great record this year, but don’t be fooled—they are still my bet to take the spur.

Captains Tip of the Day

Ø Relax and kick. But if you pop out, you owe the team a pitcher of beer.

Ø On D, remember to spread out. There are times when we get bunched together, particularly around 2nd base.

Ø Get the ball back to the pitcher ASAP.

Ø Remember that its easier to throw the ball to a person rather than pegging a runner.

Ø Here’s the situation: there are 2 outs and you are a runner on 2nd with no one on 1st. There is a kick to 3rd base. What do you do? Run (after all, there are 2 outs)? Stay? The answer is… Depends. The old “run on 2 outs” rule is mostly true. Yes, most times you run, but because there is not a runner on 1st, you do not HAVE to run. Therefore, what you should do is take a few steps and watch what the 3rd baseman does. If he throws to 1st, then run. If he bobbles it, doesn’t throw it, or throws it to the pitcher, then don’t run. Your 3rd base coach should be vocal and tell you what to do.

Action Item 2: Libations

Who’s bringing beer/cups/ice tonight? Learn from PJ and don’t bring a warm 12 pack when it’s 93 degrees out… We’re the late game, so make sure we have enough to pre-game and take us through the game.

Action Item 3: Theme

We’re at the point in the season where coming up with new themes is getting tough. This week’s these is 80s pop culture icons. There are a million and one options here from music, to movies, to TV, to politics, to ad campaigns and beyond. Be creative!

Social Calendar

Ø You should have received Aaron/my evite for the party on the 26th. If not, let me know. Hope you can make it!

Ø Screen on the Green is the next four Monday nights. Even if you aren’t familiar with the movie (like me), they are fun/relaxing to sit on the Mall, eat, drink, and chat. I’ll send and evite each Monday. As an FYI, this upcoming Monday I have a softball game (yea, I cheat on you with them), so I won’t get down there until 8-8:15. So we’ll need someone/group to get there early and snag a big spot.

Ø Aug. 21 is Brew at the Zoo. Tix are $55 for non-members (*ouch!), but it’s fun and for a good cause.

Ø We should do a Footloose night at a Nats game. Any interest?

And now you find yourself in ’82
The disco hot spots hold no charm for you
You can concern yourself with bigger things
You catch a pearl and ride the dragon’s wings

It was the heat of the moment
Telling me what my heart meant
The heat of the moment showed in your eyes

– Heat of the Moment, Asia

Posted in kickball | 8 Comments »

Vacation’s Over Bitches

Posted by Ren McCormack on July 10, 2008


I hope that you enjoyed your week off, but now it’s time to get your game face back on.

Post-Game Wrap-Up

The last game was ALL Footloose, all the time. We wiped up the Recess Rejects 8-0 despite playing on a super tiny field with plenty of distractions (like, say, the duechbag throwing the softball in the pond).

Post-Hunt Wrap-up

Unless your name was Steve and your pussed out and bailed early, it was a blast. For some reason, the kickball turnout was low this year. Not sure if it was because of the number of new teams, weddings, or if people took the next week off to make a 2-week vacation. But those that were there, well, don’t quite remember the entire day… Thanks PBR! The pics from the bar that Jed and I tsared are on Flickr.

Action Item 1

Are you coming to the 6:30 game vs the Cemetary Dawgs? Yes, no, or maybe so, please.

Scouting Report

The Dawgs are a new team this year, and I don’t foresee us having any problems handling them. This is the navy blue team that we played in flip cup a few week’s back. I think they’ll be a fun team to play.

Action Item 2

We need a volunteer for libations and cups.

Action Item 3

The theme this week is 80s fads. Be creative!

Captains Tip of the Day

  • When running to 1st after you kick, do not watch the ball– that slows you down. Just run hard assuming that it will be a close call.
  • Run through, not to, 1st base. That way you keep a full head of momentum and won’t hurt yourself trying to stop on the base.
  • If you sit out between innings, pick a person of the same sex to switch with the next inning so that we don’t delay the game.
  • Remember to help yourself to the schwag bag!

Social Calendar

Next Monday is the first Screen on the Green. I’ll probably send a separate e-mail about that.


All I ever wanted

Vacation Had to get away


Meant to be spent alone

A week without you

Thought I’d forget

Two weeks without you

and I Still haven’t gotten over you yet

— Vacation, The Go-gos

Posted in kickball | 17 Comments »

She Knows How to Use Them

Posted by Ren McCormack on June 26, 2008

Post-Game Wrap-Up


In a great game against Bunt Funk, we lost a tight one 3-2.  The Funkatiers stand along at the top of the division undefeated, and we hung right there with ‘em.  There were some close calls.  If one or two of them went our way, then we may have been able to eek that one out.  The cheers with jell-o shots between innings was a nice touch that I think we should continue… any volunteer chefs? 


Post-Mania Wrap-Up


Metal Mania was once again a throw down that even the Gods of Heavy Metal would be proud of.  Steve’s “boombox” provided the wattage that was required for Quiet Riot and my Monsters of Rock CD and the entire jug of jungle juice that we waxed got the night started off right.

The game got off to a late start because Ranger Dick decided to enforce the boundaries of the Vietnam Memorial, which apparently cuts about half way into our regular fields.  Because we had to get to Heaven & Hell by 11pm, we skipped the X and went for jumbo slice and dancing at H&H.  We sequestered a corner for ourselves and took full advantage of the $10 2 shots/2 beers deal.  I cabbed home at 2am and woke up with a platform shoe here, a bandana there, and in fog from the night before.  Ah, Metal Mania, how do I love thee…


The game ball goes to our pitcher, PJ, simply because he looks hot in jorts. 


Action Item 1:  Attendance


Please respond whether or not you will be at tonight’s 6:30 game vs the Recess Rejects.


Scouting Report


This is not the Recess Warriors of year’s past—they folded.  (I think Jed’s fiancé, Margaux, couldn’t take us any more.  Ah, kickball love.)   The Rejects are a new team, and I know nothing about them or anyone on their team.  So we’ll test them tonight to see if they can hang with Footloose.

Because of Ranger Dick, we’ll likely have to set up fields closer to the pond.  So let’s gather down there if the fields aren’t already set up.  Jed, I believe, will try to get there early and take care of squatting fields. 


Captains Tip of the Day


·         Just relax when kicking.  If you pop out, don’t worry, we’ll still be your friend.  But you’re cut from the team. 

·         Remember to get the ball back to the pitcher ASAP, even if there is a close call and you’re waiting to hear the result.  If there is a runner on base, and if they are smart, they will continue to run. 

·         The base coaches have been doing a great job of telling the runners when to run or stay, the # of outs, and generally helping them.  Please continue to do so. 

·         If you call “I got it,” then you damn well better catch the ball.  If another player says they gots it, then you should back off. 

Action Item 2:  Theme of the Week


80s TV characters. 


Acton Item 3:  Libations


Who’s bringing the liquid fun and cups? 


Bag O’ Schwag


Remember to help yourselves to any of the goodies that I bring.  Also, give be $5 beetches!  I’ve spent over $100 so far on schwag. 


Scavenger Hunt


I just got word that there are still openings for the Hunt.  So if you were on the fence or worried that you couldn’t make the deadline, we can still get you in.   They do NOT need to play kickball.   Spread the word!


Friday Night Grill & Chill


Cuz Saturday is the DC scavenger hunt, I need to have a relatively chill Friday night (if you’re doing the hunt, you will too…).  So if you want to come over Friday night anytime after 7pm to grill, throw some horseshoes, play a little volleyball, and sit by the campfire once the sun goes down, you’re invited to join me and roommate Kevin (Aaron is outta town).  I suppose that I can break out the beer pong table too.  Just bring a chair if you got one, some beer/wine, and anything you want to grill. 


If you can make it, cool; if not, I’m sure we’ll do it again.


230 N. Highland St, Arlington, VA 22201



We’re about a 15 min walk from the Clarendon Metro.


She’s got legs, she knows how to use them.
She never begs, she knows how to choose them.
She’s holdin’ leg wonderin’ how to feel them.
Would you get behind them if you could only find them?
She’s my baby, she’s my baby,
yeah, it’s alright.


She’s got hair down to her fanny.
She’s kinda jet set, try undo her panties.
Everytime she’s dancin’ she knows what to do.
Everybody wants to see if she can use it.
She’s so fine, she’s all mine,
girl, you got it right.


Legs, ZZ Top

Posted in kickball | 13 Comments »

Let the Mayhem Begin!

Posted by Ren McCormack on June 19, 2008

Ok there Metal Maniacs, tonight is the big night!

Post-Game Wrap-Up:

We had a great game last week against Spin the Bottle, who once was a perrienial powerhouse. They were down three players, but instead of taking the easy way out, we let them have not one, not two, not three, but four free agent players from Angry Jays Army. Even with them (or perhaps because of them), we were able to hold on to a 6-3 victory. It was tied 3-3 in the fourth when Eric (I believe) hit a big time home run into center field. For the game winning runs, he gets the game ball. Jed also accounted for our other three runs with a blast to right field.

Action Item 1:

Who’s gonna be at tonight’s 7:15 game vs Bunt Funk (formerly Grabbasky and the K-funk Allstars, formerly Schoolhouse Rockers, formerly After School Specials).

Emily, don’t forget to have the equipment down there by 6:30. Thanks for taking it.

In a swap with Bunt Funk, I’ll be providing jungle juice and they will be providing jell-o shots. Sweet.

Scouting Report:

You don’t get to be 6-0 without knowing what you’re doing. Try to not focus on the copious amounts of spandex and Aqua Net and get the job down.

Action Item 2: Reffing

Jed and I can’t ref, so we need someone to step in and ref. Volunteer?

Action Item 3: Name

What’s your fake 80s metal name?


You know the scavenger hunt is June 28 and you have to register by June 25. You’re all big boys and girls, so organize yourselves into teams. And it’s open to non-kickballers, so invite your friends.

If you have any 80s hair music, bring it!

Remember that tradition states that we are going to Heaven & Hell to let the wheels come off around 11pm. Hells yea!

Ok gang, I think the MetaL Gods are looking up at us guiding our tortured souls. Let’s do it for them.

Ps- Hi Damien

Posted in kickball | 12 Comments »