Thursday at 6:30 we (hopefully) will continue our winning tradition when we take on Terroist Foot Jab.
TFJ is a new team to the division, so I have zippy scouting report data other than their name is simply retarded. To any teammates that are offended that I used the word “retarded,” well, tough noogies. This is a team from the 80s when the tards went flying before PC only meant “personal computer.” You know, like a Commodore 64. Which, by the way, I totalled kicked ass on while playing Montezuma’s Revenge in the 3rd grade.
In summary, TFJ are tards.
Action Item 1: Attendance
Who’s in for Thursday’s game? Remember to reply whether or not you can make it.
Captain’s Tip of the Day:
Being too lazy to read what I wrote for last game, I’m just going to wing it this week:
- You don’t have to kick the crap out of the ball. You’ll probably just pop out anyway. Kinda like I did 2x last game. There’s nothing wrong with a respectible kick on the ground.
- We got a pretty cheap out last game when the girl on 1st from Legion of Doom ran to 2nd when there was a pop fly. We through the ball back to 1st base and turned a double play. There are a few lessons in this scenario. First, if you are on base and there is a pop fly, don’t take off in a full sprint to the next base. Go part way to see if the ball is caught or dropped. If it’s caught, then you still have time to run back to your original base. If it’s dropped, then run to the next base. The next lesson is that the other team’s first base coach did not do his/her job in telling the runner what to do.
- Speaking of base coaches, let’s make sure that we always have one at first and one at third. The main job of the base coaches is to help out the runners by telling them when to run (like the scenario above), how many outs there are, etc. The first base coach helps the kicker and runner on 1st, the third base coach helps the runners on 2nd, 3rd, and tell any subsequent runners whether to stay at third, run home, duck, dip, dive, dodge, duck, slide, jump, or otherwise avoid a thrown ball. When you are a base runner, listen for the instructions of your coaches. If you’re not sure what to do, ask them. For base coaches, I’ll look to the team (particularly the vets who know what they are doing) to help coach bases.
- Here’s a hint on catching a big, red, rubber ball: it’s easier to accept the ball to your bosom palms up than to catch it like you are bumping a volley ball above your head.
- When kicking, the strike zone is 1 foot to either side of home plate and 1 foot above the plate. You do not need to kick every pitch. If it’s not near the plate or too bouncy, just wait for the next pitch. You have 3 strikes and 3 (NOT 4!) fouls before you are out. If the pitcher throws 4 balls, you get a walk (or you get to take 1st base).
- Lastly, get the ball back to the pitcher ASAP unless you are trying to make an out–otherwise the ball is still in play and runners may continue to advance.
Action Item 2: Theme
This week’s theme is 80s TV characters. When you reply to the blog, include your character (but only if you plan to attend–we don’t want you steeling any good ones if you can’t make it!). There was one tard last game *cough…Tom…cough* who thought that 80s movies really meant 80s TV. For your tardiness, you have to pick a new name.
Also, remember to fill out your name tag with both your 80s name and your real name so that we all get to know each other.
Action Item 3: Libabtions
Who will step up and bring libations and cups this week? Please bring enough for the entire team (so a 12 pack won’t cut it). I supplied 2 cases and cups last week. We have enough people on the team that we can rotate drink duties and should never have to repeat.
Misc. Joo Joo
Thanks to everyone who dropped me some duckets for schwag. To the others– I’m keeping a list and checking it twice.
Actually, regarding the list, if everyone could add their cell #s, I’d appreciate it. I’ll need them in case of rainouts.
Is it wrong that a grown man just bought 144 jelly bracelets? Well, methinks not. They will be in the Bag o’ Schwag. As with every game, HELP YOURSELVES to the purple Bag o’ Schwag.
I see you, and you see me
But you’re blowin’ the lines
When you’re making a scene
Oh girl, you’ve got to know
What my head overlooks
The senses will show to my heart
With its watchingful eyes
You can’t escape my
They’re watching you
They see your every move
They’re watching you
They’re watching you watching you watching you watching you
–Private Eyes, Hall & Oates
A little something about Hall & Oates:
The top selling act of the 1950s: Elvis
1960s: The Beatles
1970s: Elton John
1980s? You guessed it, Philadelphia’s own Hall and Oates. Bust that one out next time you’re playing the 80s edition of Trivial Pursuit